you were with me every waking hour
so close I could feel your breath
When all we wanted was the dream
to have and to hold that precious little thing

When I first moved into my apartment, I got to a point during the summer where I would leave my windows open all the time and enjoy the warmth of the sunshine with the glorious fresh mountain air. Well, with the out doors come those who live in the outdoors. I was bedazzled by the lady bugs that came to stay with me because I had been told that they represent change and rebirth. At that juncture in my life, I was growing like a weed and it was the icing on the cake for my new apartment. They were everywhere, but I didn’t mind. I swept them up and cleaned them out and kept my house clean and more than anything, I enjoyed their quiet company and constant vitality.

Then lately, in “Under the Tuscan Sun” there is a tid bit about lady bugs: I once wanted to catch a lady bug and I chased and chased, but I never caught one. Then I was exhausted and laid down in a field. When I woke, I was covered in them. Now, go work on your house and forget about it. (At the end when her beau walks up he removes a lady bug off of her; nice metaphor)

Well, it is three years later in the middle of winter and the lady bugs are still here. After talking to a friend of mine who is a pest man, it turns out that lady bugs have no natural predators nor is there a pesticide for them. This probably explains why they are still here. And while there is no real nuisance, they are a constant. I cook with them. I clean with them. I find them in my coffee. I find them in my sugar. I find them in the pilot lights of my gas stove. I sleep with them. I meditate with them. I live with the lady bugs. They like the warmth of my lights and the warmth of my ovens. They don’t realize they fly into the face of death when they land on the wood burning stove top or crawl into the pilot light. John calls them the kamikaze ladies with more ability than the Japanese pilots of WWII. Now, as much as I appreciate the loyalty of these quiet creatures, they have become tiresome in their representation in contrast with their omnipresence. Although, I still don’t have the heart to squish the red and yellow polka dotted ladies, and sometimes even help them out so they don’t go down a drain or such, I am rather tired of them and gaining some frustration. Winter does not even seem to hide them away or let them hibernate because they are on the inside. I would like for them to be gone by spring, however, I don’t see that happening. A fresh crop will have shown up and once again my windows go open. I guess the tediousness of shower taking with harmless creatures is worth the majesty in which I live. Tolerance goes with love is my understanding and this lesson is that which these ladies preach.

Lord kiss me once more
Fill me with song

So point of interest in the Bible last night: Under the impression, I was that there were 12 tribes of Israel. Turns out, a tribe per se, Joseph is not, at least not in Genesis. Listing the tribes, now, the beginning of Exodus, which once existed in the last book for no other reason than to tell us that they are all dead as opposed to the end of Genesis where only Joseph’s death is listed and the particulars of his death. A whole new book there is! It is I guess, but realized I never that there would be such a definition between the books. The impressions I guess I have gotten, that they weren’t really books at all, merely chapters, however reading the cut and dry of between Genesis and Exodus, I think changing my mind is. Forming new opinions it is. (Like my yoda speak you do? Ok enough, it has been a long day of grueling data entry so I am a little batty right now) I really like reading the Bible. It gives me all sorts of insight. It turns out that the Israelites were enslaved about the time of the Ramsees in Egypt. Gee, wonder who built the pyramids………..The other neat thing is that Joseph embalms his father and this is a distinct point made, which is interesting. It enables him to escort his father back to the family burial ground in Marme. Then he is also embalmed. I thought that was kind of interesting since Jews are not embalmed. I thought they went by what happened in the first five books, guess there is more to be revealed on that one. Dinah was mentioned in three whole places in the Bible: in birth, in being taken prior to marriage and in her father’s death (Israel) which makes me wonder what her significance is to the family and life in general (maybe it is to show young women who have lots of brothers that brothers have always gotten mad at the boyfriend and sometimes even beat him up—or in the case of Dinah, out right killed him). I am so glad I am getting the real deal straight from the source. I am really glad that there is a new book at the top of every page so that I can at least say I have read Genesis if nothing else.

Things that make you say hmmm……..

So I rented this movie a last week that I was not willing to admit that I actually rented it. It was appeared to be a stupid teenage, “teeny-bop,” movie and I was a little embarrassed by it. The real reason I was so embarrassed was that I couldn’t identify the people who were in it and I felt out of the loop. The name of the movie was called “The GRIND” and it was a skater flick. The acting was atrocious. The skating was really good. The funnies were funny and the crazy guy in it was really good at being crazy. He was so good at being crazy that I felt like he probably was like that in real life and they threw it into the film. Well, it turns out that I was at my girlfriends house last night doing a load of laundry and Smallville comes on, which I have never seen before last night. Tada!! There are the guys in the movie. The dork in the movie is the telekinetic guy on the TV and the skater guy who gets sponsored and gets the girls is CLARK KENT!! Yeah and the crazy guy is the guy who hosts Jack-Ass. The movie was so-so, kind of like the TV show. I feel so much better knowing who these people are now. I am no longer completely out of the loop. Although, I am afraid that I might never watch Smallville again.

The other shows we watched were: Cold Case (augh……..bad) and the Making of the Passion of the Christ. CANNOT WAIT TO SEE THE PASSION!!!! Is coming out on Wednesday and may have to skip meeting with friends to talk about God in order to go see this flick. It is playing at THE mall of Georgia. (I love the name: as if there are no other malls in the state!!! Great marketing.) There are all kinds of cool things to the movie (i.e. the actor playing Christ, his initials are JC and he is really 33 year’s old! And he was stuck by lighting while getting down from the cross and going to sit down AND he didn’t even realize he’d been hit!) Sometimes just the hype can make a movie good.

Let’s here is for the girls!!!

I love my girlfriends. Sometimes there is just nothing like pal-ling around with the girls. Yesterday, after work I wanted to stay in Habersham County so as to not waste gas before going to the Presbyterian Church at 8 pm, so I called my girlfriend who has a house in Demorest. What a good idea that is. We talked and walked and ran the dogs. It was me, she and her roommate who is another girlfriend of mine. She has two dogs: a shepherd and a pregnant lab. The lab is pregnant, pregnant. It was such a nice trek. She lives in a nice neighborhood which winds in and out of the Soque River. All of the hills are like the Wiltshire Hill in Avondale, but it didn’t feel so bad. The trees were playing games with the sunlight. I think that the sudden burst of spring yesterday confused everyone. The dogs were so excited to be out and about. Even the dogs were both girls! My girlfriend makes the best sweet tea. It is the sweet tea that I grew up with, not the half sugar/half splenda/ half equal tea that my mom makes now. It was real tea. I like going to her house sometimes just for the tea. I try hard to make my mama’s sweet tea, but it never comes out right. My girlfriend’s tea is like my mama’s. I guess it has some of that TLC in it. TLC makes the world go ‘round. On the way to the church I was realizing how happy I was. That no matter how scary it gets financially, emotionally or mentally, it is never as bad as it was when I lived in Atlanta. And I think that I could say that I am very happy with my life. From there we went to the church and ate chocolate chip cookies and talked about God. Then we went to the Mexican restaurant for steak quesadillas. There are some days that no amount of having a boyfriend can top hanging with the girls.

Good Day Sun Shine!!!

Wow, you’d think it was spring. I know that all this sunshine has given me the hee-bee-gee-bee’s. I want to go running or play or something. Instead I am stuck working like an adult! Ugh! You’d never believe it is 65 degrees outside when it was 25 at my house this morning with such a hard frost on the ground and on my car that you would think it was the dead of winter. Now it is just past noon and you’d think it was May. I want to run and play and shop and swim. I know that it is not about what I want, but what I am willing to change. I need a job that is play for me. Like being a professional movie critic or a permanent camp counselor or a teacher. My first test to get into NGU is in April. I hope that I do okay on it. I took a practice test on the net the other day and made a 75. For no preparation and no idea what I was doing, I felt like it was a place to start. I have to take two tests: Praxis and GMAT. I hope that I do okay on them. I hate tests.

Holy cow, they’re playing the music from Tron on my all day movie music station. Tron is one of the all-time greatest movies ever. I would even say that it makes the Green family favorite list (for no other reason than how many times our family has seen it!).

this was yesterday's and forgot to post....

Don’t say that later will be better
You’ve got stuck in a moment and you can’t get out of it……………

So I figured out that my printer here at work prints up black and white pictures and with unusual clarity. Now, all over my cubicle are pictures of my brother, Reagan and now one of Alan. It is comforting to have pictures of friends and family up. Something about it eases the pang of data entry. I hope that I don’t turn into Chandler Bing, where no one knows what it is that I do. What it really boils down to is that the person that used to work here in my seat didn’t know how to use the computer well enough to create a small database for mass mailers, so now I am playing catch up on the work they couldn’t do. Everyone is all excited that I can, however, it is quite a task doing the entry. Having the faces up that surround me make things easier. Life is just life and not of severe consequence. Work is just work and has no consequences when you do what you are supposed to do. I have been stuck in a blaze mood here lately and data entry has become nothing but monotonous, although, my relationship with my boss is growing. I am becoming more and more trusted and thus given more personal responsibility as an assistant (i.e. with cars and purses, dates and preparations, who to talk to at the paper and such). I have had an occasion to become overwhelmed, but not too badly.

I went to meet with friends in Homer last night and it was a good discussion topic: One Day at a Time. You know, I used to live one day at a time, but not because I wanted to but because I didn’t know how else to live. Mostly, I never believed that I would make it to 27 years old (especially with out being married or such the predictables that come with that). Something about my life seemed with out a future so my life was day to day. It made it hard to pay rent. Then with the change of time and being up here, I have come to find that sometimes I have make myself go back to doing things one day at a time. There are some days when I plan my whole life before I know it. A great example is the line I dropped to my mom on email: I still have Saturday free, do you want to claim that spot before it fills up and the rest of my month is taken? The rest of my month…….Life has become very packed. When I first moved up here, I couldn’t fill one day with a list of things to do. Now I can’t even get it in one month!

I come with a softer answer
To the questions that lie in your path

What did I do, what did I do? Well, I worked like a mad woman and by five o’clock, work became a four letter word. There are just days like that I know, but when I am caught up in the drudgery of a task (more data entry) sometimes I feel like the hour will never come. Today is not so bad. I think it is because most of the people are gone today. Yesterday, everyone was here and the place was like a hive. The monotony was just as loud as the business of everyone around me.

Then I went grocery shopping. It is so frustrating to me to go shopping with out a list. So I try to keep a list handy, but then when I get to the store I end up with everything on the list and then some. I think that I get that from my Dad. Growing up, Dad would do the grocery shopping on his day off, Tuesday, and he would take a list, but he’d also get what ever he wanted too. We’d end up with things like Marshmallow Pinwheels or Ho-Ho’s or something (those waffle cookies with the stuff in between them). The list Dad took was the most specific grocery list in the history of grocery lists. It was the foods that our family ate according to the aisles at Cub Foods. We could make and x or circle what we needed and if we wanted to be specific, we had to right it in red pencil out to the side and if it was illegible then it was un-buyable. He would get home just prior to dinner chores yet in time for the boredom of some random homework assignment to have set in on my brain so that everyone could help carry in the bags from the store. Dad couldn’t stand for others to bag our groceries and he even taught me how to bag groceries. The Ingles baggers drive me up a wall because they use all plastic and put one item in a bag. I had three people ask me if I wanted help at the Clarkesville Ingles and the manager finally came over and asked me if I was from Atlanta. That is such a Dad trait: bagging my own groceries. I can get it in my car and my house better though when I do it. Inevitably, when Dad came in with groceries it was just in time for Fluffy to have a new can of food. Fluffy was the one member of the family who couldn’t mark his food so on occasion there would be the random stop by Cub specifically for Fluff on the way out to Wednesday night church. Poor Fluff. He was crazy.

Grocery shopping was good. I spent more than I wanted which is typical. Then I went to take my garbage down and went to meet with friends and talk about God. It was nice. I came home to make a fire and read. I read that Joseph is manipulating his brothers. Ben got caught with the silver cup and what to do is the cliff hanger for the next chapter. I read a little in a work book of mine and crashed out. I think my life is getting simpler than it used to be. The Bible is also more interesting than it used to be. I hope that happens to other texts.

Love, Love, Love, Love, Love………..

So this weekend was delightful. On Friday I had a dinner date with my friend Peter. He and I went to the Mexican restaurant. I didn’t get off work until 6:45pm on Friday because I was doing courier work that took me to the Atlanta Speedway, south of Atlanta in the middle of afternoon traffic. It was awful. I don’t know that I will say yes to that again. I like to help when I can, but I had no idea it was going to eat into my Friday night! No one bothered to offer that info either so that I would do the task. But things turned out for the best. Normally, I have date night with John on Friday’s, however he had a stomach bug and was not up to it (neither was I to hang out with someone who has a stomach bug!). My friend Peter called so we went to Mexican and Wal-Mart. Oh! The excitement of Habersham and White County on a Friday night!

Saturday was all about fun though. I slept in and then headed to the flower shop. Gertie Mae’s was in dire straights for drivers so I told them I would help. She paid for my gas and time, and I ran all over the place with flowers stacked high in my car and chocolates too. It was lots of fun to see folks face when they get flowers. I ended up spending some of the money I made on flowers for me. From there I went and picked up my Valentine making things and headed to my girlfriends’ place to make Valentines and Cookies. Since I don’t know how to bake and they didn’t know how to paint, we both worked on our own but together and made our Valentine treats. It was great fun. The American President was playing in the background to add to the fun. From there, we all went to meet with friends and talk about God and took the treats to all of our friends. It was a terrific treat! Valentines Day is about love and I remember from Sunday-School (and my mind is rusty on this one so it might be wrong) that there are seven types of love. We studied all the different types and such. The real thing that I noticed here lately is that mostly the commercial emphasis is placed on couples (only one type of love). In all reality the day is just about love in general, no matter what the type. So I shared my love for flowers with strangers, my love for friendships and fun to girlfriends and my love for family with my gifts to others. Now, John and I did have dinner on Saturday evening, but we shared it with a couple of friends. It was nice. He gave me a box of chocolates, which was the best gift ever to receive. Anyone who knows me knows that chocolates are an ideal gift. So then, I got to share my love of my life with my boyfriend by spending time alone at the farm with him. It was a perfect ending to a loving and wonderful day. It amazes me that after all this time I still am as in love with him as when we first started dating almost two years ago.

Sunday was veg out and do nothing day. I went and spent some time with an old friend who I hiked with last Sunday. We planned on hiking Duke’s Creek Falls, however it snowed a bit instead. So he got a job at Alice’s and then he rode with me to get movies while it snowed/sleeted/rained and got cold. The cold went well with the vegging out. Cold always compliments a cozy fire and movies. I watched several movies and read several books. I cleaned a little (my house is still in the super clean mode!! Yea Rae’s House!).

Today, I am meeting with friends, going to try to do the Yoga video that I bought on Friday from Wal-Mart and read some more and clean some more. It is easier to keep the house clean once it is clean. I am reading about ten books at once, so I might have to simplify and focus. In the Bible, I am in Egypt and Joseph has laid eyes on his only brother Benjamin, which he was so moved by Ben’s presence that he wept. In Muddhouse, I am still studying about the Sabbath. In Lord of the Rings, I am still in the descriptions and history of the characters. I have a feeling this will last for some time. There are many others on the list, but I won’t go into any more detail. You get the idea. I need to read a bit.

Daisies are the friendliest flower.....

So today was a good day. I have been busy busy trying to get out the end of the super merged mail. All 963 of them are gone. I am grateful that my boss is keeping me busy. It certainly is a challenge in comparison to what all my other jobs have been like in the past. My superboss thinks I am going crazy with all the work, but my boss knows that it is busy work that gives me something to do and I will be just fine. I like my boss. She is a cool lady.

I also finished the two movies I rented yesterday evening. One was Under the Tuscan Sun and the other was In the Cut. I thought it was funny to see Diane Lane trying to redeem herself as an actress and Meg Ryan tossing trying to up root her career. Tuscan was pretty descent and Cut was a disaster. Cut was a piece for film students and crazies. I really took to Tuscan though. I thought it would be a chick flick, but it ended up being a romantic comedy and a wholesome one at that. That is always a good thing. Cut was aweful. I can't get over how bad it was. Oh Meg.......

I am going to make Valentines tonight!! I love painting and creating! It is so much fun!

Hey kid, wanna Hershey bar?

So I have found this delightful new channel to listen to that typically prevents me from singing in the office. Well, sometimes it prevents me from singing in the office. I think I am one of the few who sing to orchestral music (excluding the members of my immediate family). I do believe that the singing “gene” is an inherited one. This channel is dedicated to only movie music. Did I mention that I love the internet? And everything that is imaginably associated with music and movies that has no lyrics (duh, soundtracks) is played on this channel. It is awesome. I have to be kind of careful though because the music has a tendency to change drastically. It will go from Jaws (which is half inaudible) to Sing in the Rain (which is ta-da!!!!!). I had to sing with Singing In the Rain. It was strange to know the lyrics but with no one singing but me.

This morning I felt kind of stupid. Music really moves me, sometimes physically. Mostly, because of the Oscars, there have been a lot of up to date movies lately: i.e. Pirates of the Caribbean, Lord of the Rings, etc. And sometimes I find myself merging and mailing faster when I hear things like the Matrix going on in the back ground (or Gone in Sixty Seconds, ha! That was funny). However this morn, they began meshing in more regulars and I found myself with my hands in the air getting ready to scream: “B-52 Bomber, Cadillac of skies!! HAHAHA…he waved at me did you see that?...AHHHHH….amor, amore, amoresette, amorese…..” The thing that was so funny was that there was someone standing behind me when I shot my hands up in the air. I didn’t have the ability to explain to her what I was doing. I laughed!

the winter here's cold, and bitter
it's chilled us to the bone

So it is predicting snow again. I don't believe in snow anymore. I am restless and discontented due to the task of the day: mass mailing. The outside weather has not been the release that it typically can be when I walk outside for a break. It has been rather bleak and uninspiring. I have sucessfully mailed about 450 of the 963 mailers today. That is pretty good considering that I have to merge, label, stuff and glue all on my own. Thank goodness for the help of a co-worker though. She swooped in and glued a good bit so that I wouldn't get discouraged.

I went to see my friends in the hospital with the hairstylist girlfriend last night. They looked so much better by the time she got done with them. You could tell that they felt better too. One got the green light to go home and begin out patient therapy come Monday and the other got a feeding tube, which is not a good sign. They were relieved for the pampering though. I went home afterwards and built a lovely fire and watched a weirdo movie. I didn't get to see both of the wierdo movies I rented, but that is okay. I am going to turn them in because their time is up, so I don't know if I will re-rent the unwatched wierdo movie. It is nominated for best feature documentary (the whole premise behind renting it in the first place), but for some reason I couldn't bring myself to watch it. I hope that I will be able to get Lost in Translation. It seems rather interesting. Who would ever guess that Bill Murray would be nominated for an Oscar? There are only two copies in my movie store though. There is not a crowd for it apparently (either that or the manager doesn't know their stuff!). I am really displeased with the confusion in my movie store. There is not enough room for the movies to move from the newly released section to the regular section so everything is mushed together and it is a stroke of luck if you go in with an objective and come out with it achieved. The other bad thing is that they are still in the transition mode from DVD and VHS which is bothersome to the eyes. You think that there is a movie in and no it is in VHS only. The people who work there are really nice though. They are pretty decent at reviewing too and we have long conversations. There are not very many people who can carry on descent movie conversations.

Oh well, time for fires and new movies. I am so tired. I did stay up to finish the movie last night and today I paid dearly for it. I will zonk out at pumkin time tonight, no questions asked.

Heaven bent to take my hand
And lead me through the fire
Be the long awaited answer

So it was probably one of the best nights of my life on Friday. I have never really “coupled” before, it was nice. I made a beautiful salad that was totally unplanned to be as spectacular looking as it came out. It was a baked chicken over a lovely bed of leafy green lettuce and romaine, complimented by apples, pears and grapes. The brownies, cookies and cake went over well for dessert too. I still have a lot of dessert though. I have a whole pan of brownies. Next time I will go even more simplistic on the dessert (like strawberry shortcakes). I got home about an hour or two before the guests arrived and cranked up some good old fashioned loud music off of the Romeo and Juliet soundtrack while I was cooking and touching up the apartment. I wasn’t sure what to do, but it turns out that I have a wide range of mixed match glass wear that make terrific votives! Atmosphere was so cool to add to the party. We took my brother’s advice (the Game Master scores!) and played Taboo! It was a scream. Cari and David won by three which was good. We played to 50 because other wise the game would end too quickly. We also had an awesome fire going in the wood-burning stove that was oh, so beautiful and was the icing on the cake. How much fun did we have? Bunches and bunches. My apartment is still in the super clean mode too! Woohoo!

Saturday, John and I went to see the two men who are our friends who were in the hospital. One was drastically different from the way I saw him prior. He was not really present emotionally or mentally. The nurse said that he had a long day physically. The other was standing with his arms wide open with a grin from ear to ear. Apparently, they are not allowed to stand on their own, but he was on his way to the bathroom and the nurse was propped in front of him ready to catch him if he fell, and I happened to walk in at the same time. He says that it takes him quite a walk to get over to the bathroom, but he is so glad that he can walk, he doesn’t care. It was a nice visit and I was glad that I went. I went back on Sunday because they both made requests for things. I am going again tonight, because they both need haircuts and my girlfriend the hairstylist asked that I go with her and show her the ropes. It does hurt my heart though to see these men in such altered states, but mostly I am grateful that they are alive.

The other cool thing I did on Sunday was hike Anna Ruby with an old friend. He and I go way back to Smoke Rise time and he means a lot to me. I am glad he found his way to these mountains and hopefully he will find his way to God. That is what he is here for. We talked for what felt like forever and are planning another hike to Duke’s Creek Falls next weekend, depending on his work schedule. It’s nice to see old friends, especially when there is a connection like the one we have.

Overall the weekend had a nice feel to it. I am very grateful that I will get to curl up on my own to a weirdo movie that I have rented tonight though. I sometimes get social-ed out and need to slow down and regroup. That might happen tonight. We shall see.

I only hope
that I won't disappoint you
when I'm down here
on my knees

and sweet
sweet
sweet surrender
is all that I have to give

Sometimes I wonder if what I am saying when I pray is right. Last night I was reading about Jacob and Rachel again. They have a lot recorded about them. Anyway, they ran away from Laban (her Dad) and are now hiding from Esau (his brother). Two things have crossed my mind: why did Rae steal the family idols? What is Jacob (Now Israel: he wrestled a man who touched his thigh and was renamed) so afraid of? I mean, if I am worshiping God in the only way I know how, and God is not giving any real stipulations on how he wants to be worshiped, how do I know that I am doing the right thing? Why should I be afraid of my brother (both figuratively and literally)? For me, I don’t know about idols or anything. The only reference I can personally make to the idolatry is alcohol and cigarettes. But I know that when I am not in alignment with God’s will, I am typically in fear. Usually fear creeps on me, too, in stealth when I know I have done something mischievous. Anyway, as far as I can see, Rachel and Jacob are up to no good. The other thing I wonder about is, what did Rachel say in her prayers? I say the Jabez prayer and a couple of other things that I made up, but am consistent in the made up part to make it feel rote.

On a lighter note, I ate at Gertie Mae’s today. With the last of my play money ($2), I bought a yellow, Gerber daisy. Kathleen is right, daisies are the friendliest flower. She is standing tall in a black coffee mug decorated in the latest fashion of a pink skirt of tissue paper. It is just delightful to have her at my desk as I go nuts with a data entry day. She has little slits in the end of her petals that make her tips have a spork like quality. She will enjoy joining the tulip, rose and the lilies. Those flowers are still kickin’ at the homestead, keeping my c-h-r-y-s-a-n-t-h-E-mums company. The mums are ready to move into a new pot. They have about had it with the current one. Anne is going to college, speaking of flowers. She is going to Redmond with Gil and Rachel Lynde is coming to stay with Marilla. Diana cried. It made me cry too. I wonder when Anne figures out that she is in love with Gil, because Gil already knows.

Speaking of girlfriends, (Diana and Anne) Cari, my girlfriend, is coming to visit and couple with John and I tomorrow night. I am so excited about having guests tomorrow. I cleaned like I normally clean with a little extra umph last night and tonight I am going to super umph clean. The big thing I have to clean is the wood burning stove. Ugh. I am serving a baked chicken over a bed of romaine lettuce with some type of fresh baked wheat styled bread; sweet tea, diet coke for beverages and coffee and cookies and brownies for desert. I noticed in the Anne novels that there is emphasis on the foods that are prepared and I also heard and article on NPR about culinary delights being of honor and not labor, I want the menu to be good to eat and good for us. We are also going to play a game, too. I hope I can play with a light heart. I have a tendency to become too involved in the game, but I want to change, so I want to play more. I don’t know the game yet. That is a decision in its self. I have been getting suggestions from the Game Master, Carter, so hopefully things will pan out well. My parents were big on games with other couples: like Scrabble with Uncle Mike and Aunt Mary; Monopoly at the Godfrey’s and Dungeons and Dragons with the youth group in Centerville and it seems like they’d play Rook with the Browns.

Oh what a beautiful morning,
Oh what a beautiful day…

I am the successful mail merger!!!! Horray!!! It has taken me all of my computer life to figure out how to mail merge and not kill the computer. It turns out, I can mail merge. I think that will be something I include on my resume from here on out: professional mail merger. Today there are 250 mail merged letters and 250 mail merged envelopes that were printed, signed, sealed and delivered!! Yes! That’s right I merged not just once, but twice. It was so much fun that my boss decided that I could do 1000 more tomorrow! What a keen idea! In the midst of merging, I also finished and faxed 450 doc’s their monthly reports saying who got what medicine. Faxing and merging, faxing and merging. Tralalalalalalalalala……they are coming to take me away hee hee, they are coming to take me away haha, hoho, humhum……

Rain, Rain,
Go away,
Come again another day……

It rained. No snow. It rained. It rained a lot. If it had been snow, I would be cozied up by a fire in my apt right now reading Muddhouse Sabbath, but no! It was three degrees too warm and we have really wet roads with kitty litter all over them (which I think might be more dangerous than ice to drive though!). I don’t know how people don’t believe in God: I mean the weather man can’t predict the weather so that in its self tells me that God is in charge! I am really sad that there is not any snow. We need a good snow.

My girlfriend had her birthday last night (she is two!) and her speaker didn’t show, so I got to tell my story. It is a big deal to tell your story in my world and I haven’t done it in a while. There is something relieving about telling the truth to a group of people. While my story is not the most crucial or life threatening, it has weight and value and is worth telling on occasion. Tom says that if each person could write like Emerson or William James that their personal story would be a best seller. I think he is write: I mean right. I think that people’s lives and the perspectives that each holds, makes for completely interesting tales. It was a very cathartic experience. There were not very many people there due to the increment weather, however, it was a comfortable crowd and I didn’t have to stand up for it or wear a dress(mostly because I didn’t know it was going to happen), so it was nice. There was ice cream cake afterwards too, which always makes things delightful.

I didn’t make a fire last night because it was so warm. I was also extremely tired after the whole story telling. I was in bed and done with reading by ten fifteen and away in sleepy land. I have been reading about Rachel and Jacob. Last night was the chapter on the twelve tribes. I thought that the tribes were from Leah and it turns out they are from a variety of women, one of which was Rachel. She only got to bare one son so far: Joseph. God overlooked her because Jacob loved her so much more than Leah. It is amazing the things that happen as a result of self will. God says here’s a great wife for you and us humans say: nope I want her sister. So when we have two wives, He blesses the one he wants to bless. Although, I think there is some significance to Rachel only having two children, we are just not told what that is. In the fictional novel I read, Rachel was a midwife as a result of her bareness. What a gift to have in place of the status of actual child bearing one’s self. But the Bible is not as creative, just the facts ma’am. Rachel also sells off her turn with Jacob for mandrakes to Leah. It turns out that mandrakes are a narcotic thought to bring on conception and they are pretty. They look just like the ones in Harry Potter that are used for de-petrification. The next time around though, when it was her turn, sure enough she had Joseph. The Bible is much more interesting than I thought it was going to be.

Let it Snow,
Let it Snow,
Let it Snow……


No it is not Christmas, however, it’s getting scary-scary outside. The temperature is dropping by the minute. There is ice forming on the limbs of the trees outside. The sky is one big billowed cloud like the stuffing in a pillow. The intensity is building. My super-boss just came through and said that everyone is to leave by 3 pm or earlier. The schools just came over the local radio and are closing at one. Hurray!! The snow is on its way.

I had such a good weekend. There was a gigantamo birthday party on Saturday. We had forty five people go out for dinner to the Mexican restaurant!!! Those Mexicans were in overload mode with the party. Then Sunday was football, however, I didn’t watch anything except the commercials. I talked to everyone and ate way to much fruit. But there was a nice gathering of folks at Cari’s house and she is in her NEW place that is beautiful. She keeps telling me that it has roommate potential. It is so nice…….maybe she is trying to drop me hints. It is nicer than my place by a long shot. And it would cost less, by a long shot. Hmm…..guess I should look into that. The gathering was cool. I missed the boob though. Everyone else jumped out of their skin, but I had my head turned.

I was glad that I made the decision to over collect kindling for my fire for the next couple of days. Lots of warm fuzzies for winter when it comes to snow and fires tonight: Ho-hum the joys of winter life!