living usefully....walking humbly...kneel before the breath of God...
I pray every morning and every night. I read a meditation with my bowl of cheerios. I go to church on Sundays. I wear my DOK cross to let other people know that Christ is my Lord and Savior and this is how Christians act. But to know if I am living usefully? walking humbly? grace? How do I know about grace?
What I do have, is a desire to live that way. Last year I wrote a piece for extra credit that said that I want to be an accountant as a direct result of my walk with God. I really believe that I can be of use to God counting beans! Who would ever think such a bland profession would allow me to be of service. But now that I think about it, Matthew was a tax collector.
That makes me think about the word disciple which is so close to discipline. Shoo...discipline means so much: it means a study, means a correction of behavior, punishment (ooo, yeah, don't like that one), obedience (yep, not so fond of that either, instant rebellion at the spelling of the word).
Usefulness through discipline, now that's something I can do. I can pray everyday. I can study my bible. I can help others. I can go to school and make good grades. I can love my husband. I can honor and cherish him until death do us part. I can be a good sister. I can be a good daughter. I can be a good granddaughter. I can be a good friend.
I have run across a lot of people lately who I'd like to emulate in their faith. I hope others can see in me what I see in these people. They stand out to me. They are not anyone person and their friends. They are random Christians who have shown up lately, like my old friend from Smoke Rise, my cousins, a constant blogger buddy and former big sister from Agnes Scott, a random stranger at school who let me eat lunch at her table in the lobby and one of my wonder women who I graduated with, who I'd never peg, totally fulfilled in her walk with Christ. The way they show themselves shows their humility, their usefullness, their joy.
I have been given the Grace of God. There is no question about that. I honestly believe I got more than one dose of it. I just hope that I can be of service with this gift.
Yo tengo ganas. (that's for kelley)
I have the desire.
1 comment:
Living with grace...that's something that I struggle with everyday, especially showing and giving grace to my two daughters. It's so easy to deny them grace when they are the ones that need it most from me.
I just finished reading Respectable Sins and it really hit me broadside. Grace is something I need to be not only seeking everyday, but also giving everyday.
Du said recently that what he (and I realized is me too) has gotten away from is waking in the morning and asking God, "what do You want me to do today?"
Thanks for this post.
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